Just to let you know, I appeared in court yesterday, for the final time. The program completion document you offered was accepted without question. I have now entered into a Peace Bond, for a 12 month period, with some communication and distance restrictions that were requested by my ex-. I'm a bit disappointed in that regard, but really, I just have to "let go". My freedom and ability to travel far outweigh being in what had become a "toxic", non-reciprocal relationship.
I will continue to utilize conflict avoiding strategies in the future, as well as the mindfulness exercises. If you know of any good books regarding Buddhism, or mindfulness, I'd appreciate you sending me a list of titles. I am far from being a violent person, and do respect others, regardless of gender, but I sometimes do need to harness my emotions and manage my stress and anxiety for my own well being.
I enjoyed our sessions, and thank you again for facilitating a quicker resolve to my unfortunate situation.
I enjoyed the structure of the counselling sessions. The discussions were insightful and thought provoking. I would go home and reflect on our discussions and contemplate how to effectively integrate what I had learned into my daily life. The homework and reading assignments were also very beneficial. In particular I enjoyed the articles on mindfulness and the research exercises. I often would read the articles multiple times to ensure I absorbed the information and interpreted it the correct way.
Some of effective tools and techniques I have learned are:
- Mindfulness, including paying attention, living in the moment, and adopting a non-judgemental attitude
- Meditation, relaxation, and staying calm
- Identifying my anger provocation or triggers
- Taking time-outs to prevent anger escalations
- Reducing stress through breath awareness and breathing exercises
- Ways to prevent my behaviour from being an automatic function of habitual thoughts, perceptions, and feelings
- How to change from “Power and Control” to “Equality” in relationships
- Being aware of the negative consequences of excessive anger
- Ways to improve my communication and negotiation in personal relationships
- Stress reduction through living a healthy lifestyle, such as exercising at the gym or practicing yoga
I have learned how to walk away from conflicts to prevent arguments from escalating. I now realize others have the right to be upset with me and that is not something to be angry about. I can simply choose not to be angry and enjoy the day. I can only control my own actions so it’s up to me to walk away.
I have enjoyed participating in the PARS program and have learned a great deal about people, feelings, how to address stressful situations, and how to approach others in a positive manner. I admit that I have started to approach each day with more positivity and have gone as far as helping strangers.
I have learned to walk away when problems arise and how to become more patient when making decisions.
Since I started counselling, I learned new ways of thinking. I became aware of my feelings, I learned new methods of dealing with people in a more appropriate way and I have applied it in my daily life. I have seen lots of positive results.
I have learned to be a calmer person and how to think about different situations more clearly. I also learned how to care more for my family at home. I learned that alcohol is not a good thing for me. In addition, I want to let my wife and kids make more of the decisions so that, as a result, the family will be happier.
I have learned many techniques on how to manage anger. I look forward to becoming a kinder and more loving husband.
Counselling has been helpful because it has made me think about what triggers my anger and has helped me understand that I can prevent unnecessary anger, control my emotions and resolve conflicts without hurting anyone else or myself.
I have really enjoyed taking this course as it has helped me become a better person overall. I can now better manage my anger and I’m not going to let it control me anymore. I plan on taking all the tools I have learned so far and will apply them to everyday life.